I wanted to make a blog post about something I don’t tend to talk about on social media much, and that is the relationship I have with my wonderful boyfriend Chris. He’s really shy, which is why I don’t talk about him much. BUT THINGS NEED TO BE SAID, GUYS because he is the best man I’ve ever known and I’m extremely thankful to have him in my life.
Honestly, there’s a lot of shitty things happening in the world and I believe that him and I have something really great and I wanted to expand on it for a minute. I know when reading this some people may think, “yeah its so great because they aren’t married with kids yet”, but eh, whatever. Let me just dwell on how nice it is at this moment. Maybe we can look back on it if we hit a rough patch. Maybe you can make a list of your own to look back on.
So. Welcome to the world of cmu-butt and kirty-poo.
I now give you, 15 things I love about us
#1. The whole cooking situation.
Pretty much every day, Chris makes breakfast and I make dinner, and for lunch we just make ourselves our own meals. I’m not much of a morning person so while he makes breakfast, I get ready for the day (shower, makeup, hair etc.). He gets burnt out come afternoon/evening time, so I make dinners while he relaxes. It’s a system that just works. Even though sometimes he hates making breakfast and I hate making dinners, or maybe one of us isn’t feeling well so the other will take over. And sometimes we take turns who gets to make the coffee (we both hate it). I’m sure it won’t always be like this, but we’ll learn to adjust when the time comes.
(photo from Valentine’s Day when he made me a fancy pasta dish)
#2. We say “please” and “thank you”.
Even though I hate saying “please” (ugh I don’t know why it takes so much out of me every time I have to say it), we’ve always made it a habit of saying “please” and “thank you”. Its nice feeling being appreciated.
#3. That little opening the door thing we do.
Okay, I know its a complex situation nowadays, the whole “opening the door” thing and feminism and all that (and I am a feminist). But…Chris has always opened the door for me from the very start and he still does it daily. Its who he is and I really do love that about him. He even opens the car door for me when I get in the drivers seat. What I do, is open the door for HIM after he opens the door for ME.
So it goes like this: We’re both walking to the car. We decide that I’m going to drive. So he’ll walk over to the driver’s side and open the door for me and I’ll get in and if its hot in the car I’ll ask him to leave the door open while he gets in on the passenger side, and while he’s walking I’ll start the car (so the air conditioning/heater can get going) and unlock the door for him manually and if I have time, completely open the door for him from the inside.
Or, if he’s driving: He will open the passenger door for me, hand me the keys, I start the car while he’s walking and unlock the door manually for him and open the door from the inside if I have time.
We’ve always done this. It has become second nature for us and I love it.
#4. We’re kinda the same person.
Maybe its because we’re both Geminis and his birthday is 2 days before mine, but we’re so alike that its actually really weird. We dress alike all the time without planning (and then one of us will change because we don’t want to look weird). Whenever we’re thinking about dinner, sometimes I’ll stay quiet and see what he says he wants and a lot of those times he’ll say exactly what I’m thinking. Even when we’re watching YouTube videos and there’s “suggested videos” on the side, he always chooses the video I was hoping he’d click on without knowing. There’s a ton of weird stuff that’s always happening. I always tell him to get out of my brain.
#5. We rescued a weird black cat named Seelie.
Ohhhh Seelie-turd how you’ve made our lives so much more interesting. We adopted her while we were in college and she has brightened up our lives. I always joke that she is the cat version of us, because she’s a goof (like Chris) but a bratty goof (like me).
#6. Our heights are perfect for each other.
When we’re standing in line for something, he can rest his chin perfectly on the top of my head. It’s just perfect.
#7. Our texts.
I often hear that many couples don’t really text each other too many times throughout the day (maybe they just don’t have the time to), but Chris and I text each other at least once every 3 hours just to see how the other is doing. I don’t know, I miss him when he’s gone, and I like hearing how his day is going, and if it’s not going well I’ll send him a picture of Seelie doing something funny or being lazy. We talk about weird stuff or send each other funny things we find on the internet. And we always text each other asking for advice on designs or new paintings or whatever creative thing we’re doing. That’s a big plus about 2 creative people dating, constant feedback whenever you need it.
Which brings me to my next point,
#8. We’re supportive of each other.
We both majored in illustration in college, we’re both in the beginning stages of our art careers (me with illustration and design, him with graphic design), we’re both a little lost and confused but we have each other to lean on. I think its something that non-creatives and family don’t quite understand, but him and I are on the same page. We fight through it together and try to help each other succeed. He’s also very supportive of small changes in my life, Me: “Babe, I’m going to dye my hair green.” Him: “Do it!” Not to mention, he helped me set up my art show my senior year of college, helped me sell my artwork at 2 different conventions, and taught me how to use his camera to shoot photos of my artwork. The list goes on.
#9. Our humor.
From the very beginning he has made me laugh like no other person has. He taught me how to laugh out loud just by being the huge dweeb that he is. He brings out the best in me and I don’t have to hold back with him. If we’re mad at each other for any reason, we usually break the tension by laughing about something. And he knows when I’m tired I get super giggly about really dumb things. I never knew that about myself. I think I’ve laughed more with him the past 3+ years than I have my whole life.
#10. Our open communication.
I’ll tell him when I’m going through something. PMS? I’ll warn him beforehand. And we always talk about how our days went or what’s bugging us.
#11. Cleaning is equal effort.
Sometimes I make the bed, sometimes he makes the bed. I’ll clean the kitchen and bedroom, he’ll clean the bathroom and living room. Sometimes he feeds Seelie, sometimes I feed Seelie. We both help with laundry. Everything is pretty equal. Except Seelie’s litter box. He cleans that. I can’t stand the smell of the litter box. I’m sorry.
#12. We admit our mistakes.
If I’m being a butthole, I’ll admit it and say sorry, and vice versa. We hate fighting so the sooner we talk about it the sooner we can get over it. We’re usually on the same page with that. We’re not afraid to say when we need some alone time and he’ll go play video games and I’ll watch a movie or something.
#13. We take turns taking care of each other.
He and I are both pretty sensitive so often times when it feels like the world is ultra shitty to us, we take care of each other. Sometimes I’m going through something and he’ll step in and make dinner or just listen or watch a movie he doesn’t want to watch with me, and sometimes I’ll play video games with him or bring him beers while he plays video games to clear his head, or buy him a burrito. We’re always there for each other. We look out for one another.
#14. We can sense when there’s something wrong.
The thing about living together for 3+ years is you kind of become the same person. You just kinda know everything about that other person. For instance, when he’s being an impatient butthole at the grocery store, that means “let’s get out of here asap because this dude needs to eat.” I’ve been battling with anxiety for years now, and he knows when I’m having a hard time and tries to help any way he can. If I’m super quiet he knows something is bothering me and asks if I’m okay. It goes hand in hand with our open communication.
#15. We’re not sick of each other after living together for 3 years.
I just love him and I’m really happy that I’ve found someone as perfect for me as him. Its sappy, I know, I agree. It’s just really cool that we found each other and I’m extremely thankful for him. Way to go, universe.
I’ve probably embarrassed him by writing this, but oh well.